No, I'm not depressed. I am actually quite happy, overall. I have an amazing hubby who I love more with every breath I take. I have a beautiful son, Liam, who was born happy and healthy in May last year and is a blessing and a joy and gave me the best gift ever - being a mother. I am pregnant with our second baby (due in September) and we're thrilled and can't wait to meet him/her. I have a great job as an independant consultant for Pure Romance and get paid to do party it up with awesome women. I have a great relationship with my family, and with my hubby's family. I have a lot of friends, some even go back nearly 25 years. I'm Christian, and if you are too you know the amount of comfort and happiness that brings. (If you are not, you don't have to stop reading, this is not a religious blog, I just want you to know me before diving in!)
I took all the steps. Graduated high school. Had a ton of life experiences for several years after (this blog is not to get into those, though some may come up later. Nothing crazy, just part of what shaped me.) Dated. Worked. Dated more, worked more. Fell in love, got engaged, started my business, got married, have a family. We have a house, both have good working cars.
The big picture is a happy one, but there are little things that need work. I want to set a good example for my kids, my friends and family, and even my hubby. I don't think that doing what makes you happy is selfish - I think it's the most selfless thing you can actually do...after all -
I want to be healthier. I was overweight (not a lot, and I don't particularly look "obese" though the little Wii Fit guy seems to delight in telling me I am) when I got pregnant with Liam, and I didn't lose all the weight before I got pregnant with Raspberry (our nickname for our new baby). I'm not trying to lose weight while pregnant, but I'm trying to not gain a ton either, and just overall be in better shape. With my last pregnancy, I had some hip issues and I started to see a chiropractor (shout out to Dr. Jackie Flynn, I highly recommend her if you're in the area!) I recently found out just how bad my posture has become (yikes!) Other things? Silly, really, like years of drinking coffee have stained my teeth and I DESPERATELY want to wear red lipstick on occasion. I miss enjoying reading - I used to love to read, but lately I sit down and find I have too many things I need to get done to concentrate. I miss going to church - our church is a commitment, not because they require it, but because it's 45 minutes away and I am just not a morning person. There are a lot of tiny fragments of weird that make up the puzzle pieces that aren't fitting quite right into my life. Rather than "make them fit" and being perpetually uncomfortable with little pieces of me, it's time to make some changes.
Happiness is a choice, one we need to make every day. This is me making that choice, and I encourage you to do the same!
xoxo,
One Happy Mama
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